You will be here in about two months and I can hardly believe it. I only really feel pregnant (aka: large!) when I look in a mirror, run, you kick, and when I toss and turn at night because I can't sleep on my stomach. Other than those moments, the idea of you is kind of surreal.
Well, your life thus far in this world has not been "normal"...
-The day I found out you existed was one of the worst days of my life, yet the idea of not having you now makes me feel defensive and I can't imagine the future without you.
-You were not planned, yet you are very wanted and loved.
-Instead of it being exciting to tell people about you it's scary, yet it's exciting watching God make me stronger and teaching me not to care so much what others think.
- I was overwhelmed at the idea of preparing and providing for you, yet people have been extremely generous loaning furniture, giving gifts, sharing advice, and spending time with me.
- Your first six months of your (in womb) life were spent in Mexico City, yet I was protected and cared for despite the emotional and physically difficulties of being alone and away from "normal".
- A lot of sorrow and regret has come with your existence, yet every one of your movements and kicks remind me of your precious life and the joy that you will be, (the one quality that I have fervently been praying for you is that you would be truly joyful...and I think you already are).
So, though your little life thus far has not been normal, I am thankful. I am thankful for you and the plans God has for you. You were a surprise to me, yet you were not a surprise to Him, "Before He formed you in the womb He knew you,and before you were born He set you apart; He appointed you a prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5
You were not made to be normal. You were made for more than normal.
Love,
Your Mom
and the tears have begun
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